Monday, April 11, 2011

Brilliant money making ideas

So, everyone needs money, and I am a person, so by the transitive property, money needs me?  I need everyone?  I was never really sure on the transitive property.

Anyway, here are a few brilliant ideas I plan on exploiting sometime in my life somehow to make money.

  1. I am fairly adept at making noises.  Tapping, tsk-ing, knocking on things, using random phallic objects as drumsticks.  I will even sing a song to myself as I'm chewing so as to keep up some king of internal rhythm.  This MUST be worth something to someone
  2. I can make, like, 10 different kinds of paper airplanes.  I'm thinking of having a paper airplane sale.  I'll color them with crayons.  and tear out little ailerons so the paper men can steer the aircraft.
  3. Once upon a time, I was very good at hacky-sack.  I think somewhere in the back of my mind that translated either to a soccer career or a gig as a ninja.
  4. I like playing with boys from the ages of 2 to 12.  Legos, and army men, and helicopter sound generators, and war, and capture the flag.  I could go on for hours with sweet games.  Maybe i could start a daycare for just little boys.  Or would people see that as creepy?
  5. Discussing sciency stuff.  You know, Astronomy, chemistry, physics, and the like.  If you're at a party surrounded by geeks, you could call me, and i'll show up, and talk to them for you.  Maybe I'd get their number and hang out with them on the weekends for you.  Maybe we could all go to the science museum without you.  Watch some Bill Nye.  Who knows?  you're just not invited.  But I'll expect a check.
  6. Blabbering excitedly about absolutely nothing.  I'm not sure how this will make me money, but I'm good at it, and with a little bit of creativity...! (crosses fingers hopefully)
Ok that's all I can think of.

Note: this was written just as I was about to leave on Friday, and I was rather coffee'd up and excited to go home and be awesome with my wife and son all weekend.  So don't take it the wrong way if I don't seem "Monday" enough for you.  WOO HOO


  1. An all-boy daycare run by a man is not at all creepy.

  2. My hubby has said before that he would like to start Daddy Daycare this summer to get some extra money for us...I'm not 100% sure he's just kidding.

    You need to finish this post with the patented (ok, not really) Amanda Austin "DON'T STEAM MY IDEA!" It's sort of like a copyright statement except not legally binding.

  3. I would like one paper airplane. Plus a paper man.

    The paper man is where you get me, isn't it? Airplane is $1, paper man $1035.


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