I've been trying to figure out a way to relay this information in a funny and clever way, but every time I put something down, it just turns into a whining session. So let's just leave it as it is. Commence whining.
Our babysitter's leaving us.
Exactly at the worst possible time, because we were increasing her hours because there's a chance my wife needs to go back into the office daily (she was working from home since Sammy was born).
Granted, we were paying her slightly above slavery rates, but Sammy is an IDEAL child - with almost no crying, and he's immediately and easily consolable and he sleeps about as much as a narcoleptic cat. And, when we offered to match and exceed whatever job she was leaving us for, she said that it wasn't about the money.
And now, oh man. The candidates we're getting are characters. They ALL want top dollar, but most are about as fit to take care of a four month old as a quadriplegic pedophile with tourettes. One of them came in and insisted that we're not treating our son well because he's not eating yogurt and soups yet. And if we were to hire her, she'd cook him all the soups he could possibly want. I can't possibly imagine justifying paying these people so much money; it's almost enough money to make me seriously think about quitting my job. Or training a chimpanzee. At least with the chimp, I'd have someone to party with.
But, we wouldn't be in such a jam if the outgoing babysitter didn't instantly develop schizophrenia when she told us she was leaving. She immediately pretended like it was OUR fault that she was leaving. We tried to be polite and cordial, but this woman barely even says hello and goodbye. She's got two weeks left (thank god she gave us at least a little notice), but I think she's actively trying to get fired.
Example: whenever we're home with her at the same time, we'll make espresso and offer her a cup. She has always accepted gratefully. But the day she told us, we made her espresso, and she replied "do NOT do this again!" all angry.
Given the fact that she could kill all of us with her mind, I'm not gonna make any more coffee for her, but I can't wait to get her out of the house.
Anyone know of any good babysitters? Preferably those that do not know how to handle an Uzi?